KNIT-
Before- watch WITHOUT SOUND
PEARL-
AFTER_Watch WITH Sound!
Continuing to heal which takes a lot more time than I figured on- some days feeling quite chipper followed by a few days of decrepitude. Cobwebs in mind and arm pit- found the courage to locate a video on the procedure: an animation which if watched without sound, is actually pretty interesting- then back to single-cells
Speaking with Aubrielle I show her a poppy seed and say- 'look how small it has the potential however to grow into an amazing plant with many blossoms that size of (breasts)'- so I'm looking at the fact I only had tiny small areas of cancer on nodes but what might a cell of cancer become?
Looking at history of cancer first mention in 583 BC. Egypt -Also hundreds of tears ago some thought cancer was caused by melancholia- or the feeling one had not served God to one's fullest capacity- I think modern medicine has left out a whole system of understanding- it seems from my perspective important to treat the cancer as a complete systemic (to mean: no system of the person whether spiritual, emotion, biopshysical.biopsyhological and cultural, and environment should be considered separate from all the others)
I feel old today, but don't know what "old" feels like exactly- more accurately- I feel tired- to the bone, or like paper in a book of dust. sterie strips beginning to lift and peel from the surgical incision showing newly minted skin and fine pink scar- It's kind of exciting - a really slowly reveling foreign landscape on my chest- like a fault in the earth's crust rising up out of a low lying plain. Each day the petals of the stitches will wilt and fall from the wound- I'll sleep on my stomach, stretch yoga and marvel at how the body knits itself- so frikken amazing!
About the photo-
I lifted my blouse and pointed the camera blindly toward my chest— took one shot- just wanting to show the sterie strips-that is what these are! The pinkish skin and little marks are the remnants of the drains placed under the skin- it is surprising…those still are very tender -
2 comments:
really instructive video, thanks! 'old and in the way, that's what i heard them say, they used to heed the words you said but that was yesterday', ha ha - well, it sounds like you still have people heeding your words, so how can you be old?
danny
-Interesting theory about depression and cancer. My father died of pancreatic cancer at 51, without gray hair, a paunch or wrinkles (other than laugh lines.) He had retired from the Navy only a few years previous to the onset of his illness. It wasn't easy -- people like my Father don't retire. My parents lost a considerable nest egg to a dishonest contractor. My Mother took a job. My Father became the Garfield County surveyor, but his heart wasn't in anything other than the Navy -- the Navy offered a desk job, which he declined. Gradually he lost hope. Within months cancer took him down.
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